流年水彩

The life is full of black and white, I need some colorful things...

I don't know how many weeks are there in the whole life, which depends on how long we can live to some extent. There were power, passions and even the good attitude and concentrations in the world. I can feel it in words even pictures, which belong to some of  my active friends. The world is full of color. But why do I only see the black and white?

I know I need to write with a good structure and make it possible to possess the real value of time...However, I have no worries about myself, because I've smelt the air of freedom...

I will be likened to the raindrop which washes away the mountain; the ant who devours a tiger; the star which brightens the earth; the slave who builds a pyramid. I will build my castle one brick at a time for I know that small attempts, repeated, will complete any undertaking. I will persist until I succeed.

In a dream last night, I began studying violin. I practised and paid passions every day, and ultimally, I played a rhyme in a concert. Wow...So strange...

What's the study? Why has my father kept getting up early every day to study how to handle his photos before going to work? I've got an answer. Study is just like enthusium and hours accumlating...

Yesterday was the first day of this year, which was a good begginning as I expected.

I did not go to bed until I finished the schedule, which was delayed for I spent the most of  a day in my grandparents' home. I've never understood the meaning of 'work hard' all the time since I was a child. Exactly, I am still a child who desire the mature.

But what's the meaning of 'work hard'? Do it just keep working everyday without thinking? I got a idea yeaterday, which is once you set a goal should achieve it constantly...

Who knows how I feel

Who knows what I am doing

Who knows where the ways is

Complex

I could hear people are always thinking about how to get a stable job or how to do the best in their company for getting a higher salaries or position. Actually, I felt upset about this...

Let's think about it. When we've paid more efforts, who got the most benefits? Some believe the more you pay the more you gain. But is it true? Trust me. Someone will be happier than you, after you get the achievements in your work. It's not your family, but the boss... The boss will be the first one to rob the most part of your salaries which should belong to you partly. They give you a little money to have you continue to work for them and take up most value from your efforts. It leads bosses get richer by richer and you continue to work like what you used to be...

When you receive the payments from banks, you will find the payments is lower than then boss has promised. Right! It's tax. The government will be the second one to have your efforts. They take your salaries through the tax, which is only things are imposed on poor one and people from middle class. Rich one could always find the way to escape from the tax by their company and investment.

Thirdly, most of us want to own their houses and cars, it is same as working for bank...

What do you think? We lived just like that...

But how do we live for ourselves? I will come be tomorrow...

To be continue...

People always admire what they don't know thoroughly. I saw many of my friends who got achievements after graduated two or three months. Admire and envy through my mind suddenly. We got different achievements for we've chosen different ways...That's true...But why?

Why? Why do people admire what they don't know? Haven't they found there're plenty of pain beyond the achievement?

I think it belongs to our traditional education. We were educated to study and accept without thinking and consider what they teached, which may just be appearance. The fact that people seldom care about is whatever we obtain and however the life is. Even if we consider how long we can achieve the end and how much we will obtain in future, we might be fine...That's why we always fall to the corner all the time but difficult to escape, because something deep into the mind...

Life is changing everyday...

I stopped to be confident since I was chatting with three of my good friends who are always the best worker in our group. They decide to leave one by one which effected me deeply. When friends are all leave, how is miss Xu? And then... I am afraid that I even do not know where I will be while the group disperse...

I know I should not be thinking about such a lot, but it need more time. Think leads to fear, fear leads to angry, angry leads to suffering...

'Experiments in economic psychology have shown that most people would rather have no deal at all than accept a tiny gain while watching a fat cat guzzle the cream. '

Very dramatic...

While some wise friends communicated with me, I have made a decision to get a GMAT scores...

I've known how heavy the pressure managers have to face. Miss Xu, my master, is taking an incredible pressure and got a bad temper, which leads to the chaos on our department. I can understand everytime she lose her temper to me and feel it's not easy to be on the top position.

I feel good these days

It's close to midnight. I almost miss two days' diary. I prepared the lecture yesterday and wasted time this night.

Miss Wang is a little girl who was my partner of last two months. I felt no hope in this job, when I knew Miss Wang would leave. I planned to go to Mcdonald's to find any customers with her, but it happened just like that...I am sure it's my hardest time in my life, absolutely, absolutely... I feel no hope like waiting for a fect that no rainbow after terriabe rain...

Hehe, don't worry, I'm not afraid of the storm because I've known how to sail cross the ocean...

Every time I make communications with foreigner, the distance has always been noticed, which  make me desire my obvious improvement...

Today, I came to see the World Graduate School Tour that full of informations I have thought I could get there. But the only thing I got there was where the address is. 'Good Luck!' I will not lose my way when the next education tour come here...

There were so many visitors but few schools placed. Few agents from schools can speak chinese but most are not. I have wanted to practise my speaking. But when I first time came to a american school, the agent even can not understand what I expressed...Bloody hells....

I need to have a whole schedule about how to improve my english, I know it's not easy to persist...

Actually, I don't like many friends leave so many messenges on my blog at all, for men were hiden and women always did. It seems I know such a lot of girls that was really not what I wanted... However, I know, it shows the cares of my friends...

If somebody get here at it happen. Remember! No need to post something here! The care that I can feel how deep it is without posting. I just practise my writing here, for I doubt if I'm able to complete a whole passage...

I'm so tired... need to go sleeping...

Somebody told me they don't know my new blog address yet. I am so sorry about that. I changed my blog for I found there is a big album in msn spaces and more friends start to use it.

I decide to use msn spaces to write something that always happen in my life by chinese and practice my english writing skill here. Thus, my friends, if you want to know my life more come to see my spaces: http://oswin1017.spaces.live.com/ and no need to write something down here.

miss all of you,

oswin

When I accompanied my parents to Xiangshan Park, I received a letter about the sports of walking this morning.

Ten Years Great Walk on Ancient Silk Road 2006---an attractive name which really made me think about it greatly. If I was a second year student, I would be unhesitating to choose a group to start my passions.But at present, I have lost the confidence about my physical condition even with a little bit worry, just like I have lost the heart about my writing skill...I know I am a boy with enthusiasm in challenging, but doing more practices is necessary.

I need more time to practice and recover, and I hope I can join a group next year...

oswin